Monday, August 25, 2008

Give Me a Break

Dear Reeders,

It is I, Hector,

who am writing you in defense of my good name. I am afraid that your friend, Mickey, exaggerate when he tell you that I take 5 breaks a day. I only take the 2 breaks.

I admit I do smoke, and it is a dirty habit, but you must forgive me. I am afraid that if I quit the smoking, I will grow fat like an American, and I have the very expensive clothes which I cannot make bigger. I do not want to make them bigger!

Also, the gym is not my style. In France I like to take the walk after my lunch, but here Mickey is always saying, "Work work work, Hector, you lazy frog," and he will not let me take the walk.

I want to get along with Mickey, but I am afraid he is, paranoïaque, as we say in French. He have, I think, a Napoleon complex. He is a very small dog after all, and I am a larger rabbit.

And, so I ask you, mon cheri reader, to give me, your Hector, a chance to prove myself. I am a good rabbit, and I will not sink the ship.


Tuesday, August 19, 2008


As you all know from the Press Release--

Where are my manners?

Hello, devoted Reader, and thank you for visiting The Harriet and Mickey Chronicle-- Harriet and my weekly contribution to our loyal fans.

You know in the past I've complained about the youth, that is, the weasels. But it turns out that even the older youth, that is, Hector, has very annoying traits. When I was Hector's age (23), I spent my mornings in the gym lifting weights

and doing yoga.

I held the door for my elders on the way out, even though I was carrying both my gym bag and my fruit smoothie.

Hector, on the other hand, can't be bothered to get up early enough to exercise and spends his breaks (all 5 of them) smoking.

As you all know from the Press Release, Hector is interning this month and is due to start work on the day after Labor Day, a holiday that Hector does not understand, and not because he is French.

I am very concerned about this, as I'm sure are you. Will Hector's incompetence drag down this very successful enterprise? Will Hector continue to smoke outdoors when the weather turns cold? Many questions have been swirling around in my brain and making me lose sleep. And I am not at my best without nine hours of uninterrupted sleep. Are any of us?

Here I am, two days late with this Chronicle entry, forgetting my manners, barely keeping my eyes open as I type, and giving you-- my most cherished readers-- no tips, no advice, no good cheer.

Please keep me in your thoughts.

Your dog in duress,

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

The Tale of Despereaux

Dear loyal readers,

We were flooded with mail and calls here at Harriet and Mickey this week in reaction to the big Hector news. It's true there were some minor disputes about Hector's position in the firm, stipend, etc., but it has all simmered down now. Hector is out getting me coffee as we speak. And so I believe, he finally understands his place as an intern.

Thank you for all your concern.

On another note, I would like introduce you to a wonderful book I read a little while ago called The Tale of Despereaux: Being the Story of a Mouse, a Princess, Some Soup, and a Spool of Thread. Naturally, as a small dog, I am interested in stories of other undersized creatures, and this Despereaux fellow is quite wonderful and brave. I like to think I would act similarly if I were placed in such a position-- that is, in a dungeon filled with rats.

The pictures of Despereaux are fantastic and done by a greatly admired illustrator Timothy Basil Ering.

I also see that there is a movie called Despereaux coming out this winter. I like to think that before my time is through, I , too, will be on the Big Screen, but that my ears will be portrayed in a more flattering light.

I wonder who would play me?

Yours in print and on film,

Wednesday, August 6, 2008


For immediate release.

Hector, Harriet's nephew from France, will be joining Harriet and Mickey, Ink. as of September 1st. He will be serving as an intern during the month of August.

Hector, 23, has a degree in sociology. "I am really really happy to be joining my aunt's world-famous company," Hector said in an interview.

Asked what he would be bringing to the organization, he said, "I think I can bring a French taste to the organization and to help Mickey to get along better with the people."

Harriet and Mickey have indicated that the name of the company will remain "Harriet and Mickey", not "Harriet, Hector and Mickey," as some have speculated.

"Even when my aunt, she dies," said Hector, "I cannot imagine replacing her."

Harriet said she is not dead yet, but hoping to retire soon. The company released a group photo to staunch rumors that there has been inside fighting.